1. You’re only 15.
Oh, what a simple statement, and ohhhh how I did NOT listen. When I was 15, I dated a guy that was 3 years older (may as well have been 10 years older in high school terms). He was a bad influence…. and a complete idiot. Today, he’s even more of an idiot… Or, I’m just old enough to see what my mom always saw. When I look back on my life, especially my teenage years, I’ve got to laugh. There are so many things my mom told me NOT to do, and I went right ahead and did them. Why did I not listen to my mother?
2. Nothing good ever happens after midnight.
In high school I remember getting angry when my mother would say, “nothing good ever happens after midnight.” Well, thinking back on it… nothing good really did happen after 12, unless I was having a sleepover with my girlfriends. Staying out late typically ended in me making bad decisions. I don’t know, maybe I’ll be making my child’s curfew… let’s say… 9pm? Ha!
3. I just don’t like her.
My mom liked most of my girl friends, but there were some that she just didn’t like or trust. Those girls she didn’t like, well they ended up being terrible friends! Friends that shared secrets, stole boyfriends, and backstabbed. Should have listened to mama.
4. Don’t pierce your belly button.
If all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you? I didn’t do this, but I wanted to SO badly. Looking back now, I sure am glad that I didn’t get a belly piercing, Every girl I know that pierced their belly button has a terrible scar now and regretted it during pregnancy. It’s like my mom knew back then that one day they would go out of style (that’s some true intuition.) Thanks mom for telling me no… time & time again, and for ruining my life, and for being SO lame… I appreciate it now.
5. Don’t shave your arms, because you’ll never be able to stop.
Yeah… everyone I know that shaved their arms… well, they’re still shaving their arms.
6. Go change your clothes before you leave!
Once I tried leaving my house in a short skirt and a shirt that showed my stomach… my mom told me to change, and I threw a hissy fit. I was 15 years old! Thank God my mom made me change. Now when I see children dressed like that I feel disgusted. They’re attracting older men, and it’s terrible… and they’re using their bodies! There is no need to show that much. My mom was definitely right.
7. School is really important.
Back in high school my mom always stressed education and how important it is. I remember hating her for making me study so much. However, when I moved away and started college I thanked God for the discipline my mom taught me. I learned very quickly that a night out on the town isn’t worth retaking chemistry. Everyone realizes mom was right when it’s time to apply to grad school or land a job.
She was right, he didn’t back then, and he still doesn’t.
9. Don’t take shots.
My mother always warned me about taking shots. I remember thinking she just didn’t know how to have fun…. until the first time my fun back-fired. I remember coming home from a party and being terribly sick in the bathroom, and thinking I was going to be in sooooo much trouble. What’s funny is, all my mom said was “I bet you won’t do that again, will you?” Guess what? I never wanted to take shots again… I learned my limit real quick.
We want to rush everything in our youth… We think we are so ready for everything… like relationships, sex, freedom, etc… Well, we’re not. Waiting allows you to mature so you can actually make the correct decisions. A life of regret is not a life at all. There are so many consequences that come out of rushing your life along… Sometimes it’s better to enjoy the time God’s given you, instead of trying to fast forward ahead.
11. Read your Bible.
I remember straying so far away from God and not really knowing Him. I was bored with religion because it was all about dos and don’ts. I would always wonder how my mama stayed so close to God… Well, it’s because she read her Bible, and she understood that knowing God is not about a list of dos and don’ts. It’s about a relationship with Him. The Bible is God’s love letter to you, and it is amazing. His Word reveals truth to you, and it brings you closer to God, giving your life meaning and purpose. I wish I would have listened sooner.
12. You won’t be able to eat like that forever.
Ain’t that the truth! Yeah… no more queso all over those nachos or fries. Actually, no nachos or fries period.
13. Kill them with kindness.
Stooping down to someone’s level is easy. Remaining cool, calm, and collected takes class. My mama always said you catch more flies with honey than vinegar.
14. Don’t visit the graveyard.
Don’t talk to your exes…. Yeah… That’s one everyone should take note of!
15. One day you’ll like coffee.
Gosh, I remember I used to think it was gross. NOW IT’S AMAZING. How did I live without it? Seriously.
16. Save your money.
It’s no fun, but it’s really important to have financial security. Emergencies DO come up… and when you have an emergency, you don’t want to look at your closet full of dresses and shoes and wish you would have been smarter with your money. My mom always told me that, and it took me halfway through college to learn my lesson.
17. Be on time.
I was that kid who was always first to arrive to any birthday party, and I hated it! You don’t realize how important being on time is until you’re walking in late to a job interview, rushing to the doctors office, or speed applying makeup for a date.
18. You’re only as good as the company you keep.
As much as you think that the people around you won’t influence you, they always do. Mom’s right, once again.
19. You have friends everywhere, you just haven’t met them yet.
I remember being so sad about leaving my best friends behind and moving away. I thought my life was over. Turns out, I met some amazing women all across the South. God has always brought the most amazing friends into my life, and I feel truly blessed.
20. Your true love is out there.
I wasted so much of my time forcing love. I thought I could make it work with a lot of guys… Turns out, I just needed to be patient. When you meet the right guy, everything will fall into place, you won’t need to force it into place.
End of story, my mom was right. I’m probably missing 20 other things she was right about, but that’s for another blog…
Diamond (With some help from Ruby!)
P.S. Follow me on twitter, at @DiamondDiploma!
I’m having trouble with deciding where to go to college. I want to go to the college of charleston but it is so far away from my family and my best friend. Any advice?
It’s your education and if you can afford it (by whatever means) you should go to CoC. You’ll be home on breaks to see your family and technology is amazing enough that you can talk to them and your friend whenever you want. College is about your future and if you feel that you should go to that one, it’s probably the right choice. Good luck!
I agree with everything you said, except “if you can afford it (by whatever means). I am a former student loan counselor, and I cannot even begin to tell you what a horrible racket the student loan industry is. The way they’re structured, students are set up to fail before they even graduate. Follow your heart, but make sure you create a budget and STICK TO IT! And if you must borrow, do so frugally, taking out only what you absolutely must to get by. If you live like a poor student now, you won’t have to later.
I completely agree with Jenn. I went to a college WAY out of my budget. Got 12000 in loans, worked 60-80 hours a week, failed most of my classes, paid only around 6000 off and still owe around 9000. Go where you can AFFORD
Jenn, do you know of any reputable companies that help students prepare for the application process for college?
One of the dumbest things I ever did was make the decision to stay local and live at home to go to college instead of going away to school. Sure, I had good reasons, I was gonna be ‘saving money’ & ‘helping out’ to care for aging grandparents and younger siblings. Great intentions but life just gets in the way…my sister (who we all thought selfish at the time) went away as planned, focused only on her self, had amazing times, built lifelong friendships, met her amazing husband AND finished her master’s in only 5yrs. I on the other hand spent so much time trying to take care of family oblgations that I virtually had NO “college life” and it took a little more than 6 yrs just to get my bachelors around a full-time work schedule. If I could only do it over again, I would definately go away to school, live off of loans if I had to, and not feel at all guilty for indulging in a ME-bubble. That is what your early 20’s are for. As for the location of your friends…those people that are meant to be in your life will be there even if a continent divides you. And if college doesn’t separate you geographically chances are careers and marriage will, so you might as well develop your keep in touch plans now. GOOD LUCK!!!
I really admire the choice that you did make. It might not seem like it now, but later in life I hope that you reap the benefits of your selflessness. Many of those that join the ‘me bubble’ run dead on into Karma later on.
I, personally, stayed home and went to a university in my town when I realized that it was what God wanted me to do, and although I’m obviously missing out on part of the “college scene,” and still live with my parents, I don’t regret it one bit. Although I definitely see where you’re coming from, in some cases, staying home is the best option. I’m having more fun here, being a big fish in a little pond, than I think I would going to the university that I had planned to attend before Basically, my advice for Ryann is to weigh out her options carefully! On the one hand, you can save your money, but on the other hand, you can have a little more freedom. Talk to people from both sides of the equation and weigh your pros and cons. Good luck!
I lived at home, got my 4 year degree in 3 years, worked a year while living at home and met my future husband, who I dated while I got my Master’s degree (living an hour from home with no student loans from the money I saved the year I took off). No regrets, and no debts.
I am a senior in college and still live at home and I understand completely. Financially, it was really the best option, but realistically, I am still 22 years old and being taken care of by my parents. There are pros and cons but if I could go back, I would live in a dorm for at least one semester.
Your an idiot.
No Larry, you’re an idiot. You and your ilk. (See what I did there)
You need to do what you feel is right for you. Yes, technology is an amazing way to keep in touch with your family and friends. Try not to get caught up in the “me” bubble too much. Life is for living and going away to college is a great experience, but you need to go where you can get a top notch education and eventually a great job. In this day and age of the high jobless rate, taking out too many loans is not always a good idea. Why not trying a junior college and getting your associates first, while living at home and then if you still want to transfer you could apply for scholarships and grants for the last 2 years of college. You can still experience all the fun of college and not have to worry about bills as much as if you went away to college. Plus, you can still see family and friends a lot. Lastly, your family will look at you with more adult eyes if they see you doing more adult responsible actions.
I moved to The other side of the country for college because I decided its the best for my future, to be honest the first month was hard because I did not know the city, I had no friends. But after one and a half years I can honestly say I am so glad I did it. I am happy here now, I met great people and seeing my family is really special for me. Sometimes taking the risk to be alone somewhere is worth it! When i talk to my friends from high school now , most of the regret staying local so good luck
Go for it. If you don’t, you’ll always have that “what if” in the back of your mind. I took a jump heading off to a HUGE college from a VERY small town this past summer after graduating and I couldn’t be more fulfilled in life. If doesn’t matter if you’re shy, weird, or awkward, you’ll meet soooo many new people that you never thought possible, so go for it.
Never underestimate the power if being close to your family. I am farther away from all of my family that neither of my siblings and if I had one wish it would be that all my family lived closer to each other. Make this decision WITH your parents and you’ll be great.
If you’re still checking up on the comments here, I’d love to give you my best piece of advice! Pray. Really take the time to seek God. College has such a significant impact on the course of your life. Where you go and who you meet matter. However, even following your heart can lead you astray (like when, at 15, mine told me I was in love with the 18 year old guy who didn’t deserve me) but following Jesus will only lead you in the right direction. Personally, I went away to college but still close enough to home to visit on the weekend. My sweet mama spent so much time praying for clear direction, finances, and the relationships that I would form and God has been so faithful! My private school tuition is 90% paid in scholarships and grants, I’ve made the most incredible and radical Jesus loving friends, and there have been so many opportunities to explore my options for the future.
My point in short: within obedience to God’s will is the best place to reside. So, don’t fret! Pray. (Philippians 4:4-7)
The best thing I did for myself was move to a city where I didn’t know anyone! It was the best learning experience I could have ever done! I’m currently a CofC student and love it! You’ll make new friends right away and you will love Charleston (who doesn’t!?). It seems like everyone at school is from different states, so you won’t be the only one who is new! Also, once school starts time flies by, so you’ll be home to see your family and friends before you know it! It might be hard at first but I promise you’ll find a family of friends here too!
Spread your wings and fly as fast and as far from that nest as you can! Live your life as you want to live it, not as others would have you and you’ll have no regrets when you get old!
Try and find a trade to get into or go to a vocational school for a bit to see if any interest you. It’s certainly a better route than just “going to college”.
Sounds like you already know what to do.Good luck
There are a couple things on here that I didn’t listen to my momma about (I.e. Arms, belly button…). All well regrets are silly.
Sounds like you had a very wise mama.
Ryann, go to Charleston! You only have one chance to be young single and away to a college adventure. You will miss your family and best friend, but being away will make you appreciate them even more and they will still be there for summers and holidays. Lots of new friends are waiting for you. Just make sure it’s a college that’s NOT anti God.
I didn’t know you were listening! Mama ❤
Your momma sounds like she was as smart as my mom (I’m a Yankee)! Great post!
What’s up with the belly button thing? The scar I have from mine is tiny and even if I do get pregnant, it’s not like I go around showing people my stomach all the time.
I dont know haha, I took mine out while pregnant, then put it back after. It didn’t change. I think its more of a personal preference
LOL @ “Read your bible.”
Listen to this advice. The quickest way to become an atheist is to read the bible.
Religion is for idiots. Discrimination, hatred and violence in the name of “god”.
If there is a god, he’s not petty enough to care about whether you spend your waking moments “worshipping” him, he’ll be able to see the intentions behind your actions, so don’t waste your time praying or hoping. Take action to make this world a better place for everyone.
WHAT??? Where do you get off with this?? Sounds like you think God is some sort of ‘man’ that you disagree with…?? First question: Where did the heaven and earth come from..?? Second question: Have you ever thought about how marvelous birth is…. Third question: Where did all these “natural laws: come from?? You are trying to judge God… impossible task! God is not the same as Jesus — God controls by having what we consider bad things such as death happen and good things such as births, etc,,, Jesus was a man who showed the whole world that LOVE is the answer to your needs… In order to “read” the Bible.. you would have to be smart enough to understand that it was a transcription by humans who didn’t really know the language they were transcribing..- you have to look at what is in it and what it might have also been wrongly transcribed from… apparently you are not that advanced (yet I hope!). You probably use human terms for evaluating God — wrong answer. How long is a day where God is…?? How do you create life..? Give me a break — I realize you do not believe in God — OK – that’s your choice but please ask yourself — who gave you life? If you think it is as easy as placing a sperm in an egg — wrong! I am talking about your instincts, personality, your feelings, and on and on…. Here’s something to try — go to the hospital and find a really sick person — one about to die — then simply heal him! When you can do that — then tell me there is no god.
The bible is for people who desire answers to the bigger picture and things we can’t understand. It is not for “idiots,” it is for those who seek a method of guidance. To each their own.
Neither of you express logical points. Hop off the religion vs. “other” argument. It’s a tired one.
Thank you! Could not have said better myself!
Read 1st John. You are confused. the father in him does the work, therefore when you have seen him you have seen the father. Jesus is God in the flesh & the word, what Jesus did was through the father.
Everything said in this comment can be proved/disproved with logic and science. There is no real proof that god exists, and that’s a fact. People can choose to believe what they wish, but not everyone is open minded enough to look at both sides of the issue. I don’t believe in any god, the Christian god especially. But I can understand that some people need to believe there is something out there bigger than themselves. Being pushy and rude is no way to express an opinion if you actually want someone to take you seriously. This applies to everyone.
Um, people should be free to wear what they want. It’s the girl’s fault for wearing revealing clothing, not the guy’s fault for being creepy and being attracted to younger girls? I smell sexism and a double standard.
That’s missing the point… It’s not a matter of sexism and double standards. It’s a matter of what is smart and safe. No, older men should not be into young girls, and no men should not lust after women, but a lot of men do. That’s just a fact. When girls dress like sluts, they attract the wrong kind of guys, whether they like it or not. As an analogy suppose a guy goes down a dark alley in New York with a huge wad of 100 dollar bills in his back pocket. If someone comes along and mugs him, then sure, you can complain that it is wrong for the mugger to steal the man’s money, but it also wasn’t smart for the man to go through a dark alley in New York with a huge wad of cash visible, because yes, muggers are out there whether we like it or not. Do you see what I mean?
Lol.. I like it! Makes PRRFECT sense! Nice example:)
Well said Jeremy! In a perfect world we could wear what we want, and go where we want. But since that’s not the case we all have to use our heads.
You are right on the money on this one
I said these same things to my daughter who has said all these things to her own two children! Good job and thanks for sharing!
I was talking just the other day about when I was 13 and had my first real boyfriend. The Sun rose and went down over him. I lost focus on everything important in my life. My mom tried to tell me that he was the first of many,but I was sure we were gonna get married and live happily ever after. On the last day of 7th grade he informed me that he had joined a cult and he wanted out and the only way out was for them to kill him. So of course he said that we must have sex before he dies so he will die knowing what true love really is. How could I say no to that?! So that night he came to my window and as soon as we were finished,my dad busted open my door. I was grounded the entire summer and could never see him again. I was of course devastated. Here he was about to die any day now and I’m grounded for 3 months. So a few weeks go by and my mom comes to my room to let me know that my supposed to be dead boyfriend and my best friend were not only dating but he had took her virginity as well. I had been taken advantage of for the very first time. If I had only listened to my mother…
Oh my, we must be sisters cause we definitely had the same Momma!
I sent a link to this to my daughter. She’s 18 now…and she’s come around to seeing that SOME of the stuff I’ve been telling her since she was 14/15 is useful. That first boyfriend to break her heart when she was 15…after they’d “dated” for nearly a year? I thought was gonna kill us all! Waters have been so much smoother the last year or so.
#20 is so true!! I literally spent a lifetime chasing Mr. Wrong’s only to have Mr. Right show up on my doorstep (again, literally…he was a tenant, I was the property manager) at the age of 49! College – check, raised son – check, met man of my dreams and married last February – check. Didn’t exactly live by the “rules” but it did turn out very well in the end…or at least so far! Should have listened to mom long, long ago…but then God does have plans for us all!
Where do u think we learned all this, From our Mom!!! Been there , done that !!
this is a unique part of life for everyone. Everyone has an opinion about what they think is “right or wrong.” this is a time in your life when the decisions you make effect the rest of your life. So that being said you need to “get still” and ask yourself what do I want out of life. this is not being selfish it is deciding what your goals and dreams are. the reason you don’t know what to do is because you haven’t decided what you want from life yet. you alone have to live with the choices you make, sure others are effected. but at the end of the day you have to look at yourself in the mirror and live with the choices you make. the only advice I have is don’t let fear rob you of making a choice. most people who have regrets do so because they were either afraid to try or because they went too far. one of the best gifts we are blessed with is the ability to choose. And secondly, ask and discuss what and why your parents think. these are truly the two people who know you the very best and have your best interest at heart. this should help you make the best decision for you.
I think we had the same mother! ; )
I don’t regret my belly button piercing it was something silly but harmless and I have fond memories now of doing something “cool” and hey it’s still a trick to my kids when I can stick the ring in my muffin top (JK-sorta).
The thing I remember my mom saying and that she put in my senior yearbook was “I hope you dance” that makes me choke up everytime. <3
You should do what your parents think you should do. They know you the best and know what would be best fior you. God whispers in their ear what you should do. Give them the freedom to be honest with you and not just tell you what you want to hear.
Don’t visit the graveyard….
I love it! True story… The only thing that comes from that is stirring up old feelings which may not be healthy in your new life. There is a reason they are part of your past… Because they were not meant to be in your present! Great share!
I don’t agree with the way the one about dressing is worded and presented. Young girls and even lots of young women do not dress in a way to “attract” “older men.” They dress the way they do because they’ve been pummeled with the message that this is the way to dress. They see it in stores, magazines, on their friends, in movies, on TV – literally everywhere. “Older men” are the ones who are ADULTS and should not look at or treat young girls as sexual objects. Furthermore, men are the ones who play into and create the demand for this type of appearance and dress to be the standard. If you do not think young girls should be wearing mini skirts, stop responding to smutty advertisements, don’t buy Playboy (or the like), don’t reward movies that depict women and girls as decorative sex objects with your money and attention. Speak out about our culture and the ways advertising and entertainment use women’s bodies and turn women and girls into caricatures and sexual objects instead of depicting them as real human beings. You cannot expect a 14-year-old child to be responsible for the disgusting mess that is our society’s view of women. Be an adult and work to change it yourself.
I,m a mom who said all these things to my daughters and they didn,t listen any more than I did to my own mom. now my girls say the same things to their girls, with the same results.it must be the rite of passage to becoming an adult. but no matter what moms will always try to save that child some heartache,